I just don't get it.
I don't get why one minute, he can't return my phone call.
Then he just decides he can call me whenever he damn well pleases, and yea it's okay with me.
It's like I want him, I want to talk to him, I want to know what he's been doing.
But at the same time.. the feelings I feel for him, and the things I naturally expect from him-- I just don't get.
Am I not worth it? Am I not worth his time or his effort? That's what I feel like.
I feel like he just shoves me in a corner and takes me out when he feels like.
I'm not doing it and this is exactly why we haven't worked out in the past.
Because I feel he doesn't treat me the way a real man is SUPPOSED to treat a real woman he cares about.
Maybe he isn't ready, maybe he doesn't see it.
Well, until then, fuck that.
I refust to fucking settle,
Even if I DO love him.
Even if I DO want to make excuses for him.
I'm not going to.
Not anymore.
He needs to step up and be the man I need him to be or I'll just make my own way.
I mean come on, if you can't return my phone call until THIRTEEN days later there is a fucking issue.
''Maybe I'm being too dramatic but that's the way I gotta have it.''
I'm not going to continue to invest my emotions, feelings and time into something that is getting me nowhere.
I deserve better than that.
End of fucking story..
